Few hours at Pashupati Bridhashram

At a time when two powerful earthquakes followed by hundreds of aftershocks have terrified everyone in the Himalayan nation, there are also examples of some fearless souls who have no signs of fear to face death.

Among 230 seniors living at the only government's old-age home (Pashupati Briddhashram) located in Kathmandu, maximum looked calm as they are not anxious to face the deadly disaster.

Though the energetic youths leave their hopes at such moments, these people with wrinkle over all faces have accepted 'death as inevitable'.

Most of these personalities were kids when the powerful quake of 8.4 Richter scale occurred in 1934, whereas they have already experienced life till the latest quake.

88 years old Tirtha Maya Rai, originally from eastern region of Nepal, is among one of those fearless who did not run out of her bed located in a cozy and dark room during the quake.

Tirtha Maya Rai

"Everyone should die once in life. Why to get scared? Rather, I enjoyed the tremors as my bed was shaking left and right", Rai with a big smile on her wrinkled face shared at the old-age home on Monday noon.

Talkative and cheerful Rai has been living in the Briddhashram since childhood. She says her life has been beautiful till date though there is no affection or contact of parents or families.

On April 25 when the quake occurred, many of these old people were in the yard queued up with plates for curd and beaten-rice, as favorite of all.

Staffs at the old-age home informed that nobody was injured as nobody tried to run and protect themselves.

Mystery of 'Huey'

Two days have been passed since the discovery of the US military chopper, which went missing in Nepal since May 12 on its way to deliver the humanitarian aid to quake ravaged districts.

There are various speculations at the moment however the exact reason behind the crash of chopper UH-1Y 'Huey' is yet to be ascertained as the experts regard it as a highly sensitive issue.

The Home Ministry refused to talk about reason of the crash citing that the Nepal Army is responsible for the investigation into the matter.

"We don’t have any information. Nepal Army shall probe and come out with the exact details", Spokesperson of Home Ministry Laxmi Prasad Dhakal told on Sunday morning.

Dolakha Diary

On the third day of the powerful quake of May 12 that shattered beautiful Nepal, the situation of Charikot, district headquarters of Dolakha, some 130 kilometers away from the capital was totally depressing and barren.

The small city with tall and bright colored buildings had already turned into rubbles with the terrifying faces of locals, who have been witnessing the aftershocks for several times in a single day.

Exactly at a time when the Prime Minister and Home Minister along with other few leaders had reached the small city, the locals with tears on their eyes were preparing to participate in a funeral procession of 19 years old Anjila Poudel.

She was buried under the rubbles of five-storey Paradise hotel, located in the centre of the city while trying to escape the powerful disaster.

While the whole city was mourning, 39 years old Mingma Sherpa, the owner of Paradise hotel was weeping just behind the debris of her sweet-home, which is no more a home now.

"I and my husband worked very hard for years and constructed this hotel three and half years back with the life-long earning. And in front of our eyes, it has turned to rubbles now. My family members are safe but everything has been finished along with the quake", Sherpa with a heavy voice and tear son her eyes shared.

Tragedy upon Tragedy: Sindhupalchowk

(May 3 2015 )

Sindhupalchowk district had already suffered enough due to landslide in August, 2014 where 156 people were confirmed dead while hundreds of houses had swept away. It has just been few months, people were returning to their normal life forgetting the pain of loss of loved ones and rebuilding their collapsed and swept houses. 

They were trying to smile again gathering the broken and scattered parts.

But once again, the cruel nature snatched their smiles by taking away everything from them. Either its loss of family members or relatives, home, cattle or crops. Their strength, patience and hope, everything has been scattered once again. 

Saturday's earthquake is a doom to all Nepalese, but to the locals of Sindhupalchowk, it’s a bit more.

This district has recorded the highest death toll in the massive earthquake that jolted Nepal on Saturday noon as more than 2500 people have already lost their lives and the number is still in rise. Devastation of Sindhupalchowk can make anyone numb.

When I visited the place two days ago, the situation was quite terrific as people are still struggling to get some packet of biscuits or noodles and tent from the state side. 

It's already been more than a week, but the people are still waiting to have a single presence of the state, whose responsibility is to protect its citizens. 

Yes, we could notice hundreds of vehicles on the way with relief distribution programs written on the banner, but the locals have common plea, "when we will get some relief?" Either it was Sukute, Khaadi Chaur, Barhabise, Saaga Chowk or Chautara, the situation is similar. 

There are thousands of people but only few hundreds of tent so it's no way the relief program has been effective.

Barhabise has something different story, as it has tragedy upon a tragedy. 

Who is SHE?

She stands as mysterious creature

the way she laughs, cries, fights, dances or shops
her every expressions are unique or best at own
spreads happiness around whole universe like a candle

an innocent daughter
who is always expected to be sweet and decent
a beautiful wife
who needs to handle all, standing as symbol of patience
a loveable mother
nothing to gain, just to give for children, family

more the age, more roles, responsibilities
great expectations in every eyes, every steps

with pressure to be best both at home and work
she moves ahead with determination in head
praised as epitome of beauty, love, kindness and endurance
ignored for her strength and intelligence, then or now.

Yes, she is defined as a GIRL/WOMAN.
powerhouse of creation, womanhood, feminine feelings
But she never complains, demands or questions
as she knows her worth and stand
she nearly dies to create a new life
still never leaves a glow in her face

Stepping every ladders with footsteps of men, she moves ahead
in attempt to enjoy an independent existence !!!

Promise to self

Today, I vow to self, again

like yesterday, as last time 

when I had fallen several times
when I had felt low

screamed in midnight, cried for long
emotionally barren, perhaps

when I saw no rays of hopes
till the end of horizons

when I couldn't gather confidence
surrendered self to the lord

fought with fate, in anger
when I found life meaningless

no ways ahead to walk or run
no holding hands, no moral support

neither a goal to grab
aim to fulfill, game to win

when everything was falling apart
leaving me alone in the world

I decided to stand, fight with life
As similar I do today, a promise to self

Come around

When I will be in distance
will your heart go fonder
as mine? I always wondered.

When I will be falling down
scattered, torn, in pain
will your hands hold me or not ?

Helpess, I stand alone
waiting to see your shadow around
rays of love, close to me

Heart goes hovering
as taylor swift says in white horse,
"Why don't you come around?"

Painful Goodbyes

Everything was all set, wonderful 

life had been more beautiful

love was there, just perfect
you, me and beautiful dreams

until you walked away

with no goodbye, forgetting our way
broken was hope, my heart
scattered into numerous pieces

words forgotton, promises gone
blind trust turned blur, then dark
life became empty, all meaningless
you left, memories were honest, all stayed

faith, belief, affection disappeared
sweet moments turned bitter
lost were compassion and emotions
puzzles and doubts, sense of terror

love for me became a 'game' for you
world was mine, rule became yours
'loyalty' remained as only a mere word
fake, lie, cheat, betrayal all over

love turned to hatred, joys to pain

mornings and nights, eyes turned wet
tiring wait, weeks and months
new you, changed you, no more same you

no more love dramas, but wound inside

deep, painful, cureless, life-long
empty life, incomplete wishes, broken heart
I gifted love, you took everything in return

yet, no regrets or complains, no hatred
love was eternal, its yet unconditional
pure, powerful, selfless, divine, true
nothing to gain, only to suffer

tears for me, wishes, prayers for you
barren me, paradise is just for you
you will realize my love someday as
"whatever you give, comes around"

Its you, only you

When I first met you

I was sure its you, only you
none was in life, nor could anyone be
King of my soul and its key

all my fears disappeared

gone were insecurities, way cleared
those dark eyes, desperate and deep
Oh I murmured no more sleep

you were in sky blue, me in dark red
was hovering in dark, caught you as shed
God chosen us, special was festive ocassion
love was the one and only reason

when I first touched you
Was sure its you, only you
no touch could be same again, no second thought
no more coldness, felt a shake within heart

when I first kissed you
felt of 'we',not me or you
was wandering in this lonely planet
found a world, no pin drops of hate

life was like a desert, dry and rough
let you off from mind turned tough
only you in life, in heart, in mind
24/7 deep and lost,they say love is blind

waked up, you as first thought
off to sleep, you as last thought
you in books, you in class, you in food
all the moments, swinging my mood

no sleep, no thirst, no hunger
sweetness hidden even in little anger
jealousy, quarell, fighting all thought a part
impossible even to imagine, to get apart

cheerful I was, sadness and pain lost
bound by faith, hope, trust
dreamt of you, dreamt of only 'us'
billions out there, single you in universe

all the time, thanked to fate
found you, nor soon, nor late
love was pure, unconditional, selfless
until you turned me into ashes

Where you lost ?

I searched you everywhere
to have your single glance

to look deep into your eyes

to find my all anwers within

I searched you in shades and lights

looked behind flowers and trees
seeked you in dusk and dawn
got tired, but found nowhere

I searched you in every celebration

looked in temples and parks
seeked you behind every coffee shop
hopeless again, no hints of yours

I searched you in all novels and heroes
looked after every words
seeked you in dreams every night
you were not there, not here

I searched you in crowd
from start to end, top to bottom
looked behind mountains and rivers
eyes were wide, but you got lost

I waked up to search you in sunrise
I waited to find you in sunset
I counted all stars of sky for you
I walked miles and miles

Tired, frustrated, devastated
with no more energy and courage
found a key to my all questions
you were smiling, silent in my heart